Photo by Patty Brito on Unsplash
As I am going into summer and my kids are out of school, my goal is to really enjoy them and be intentional about the time I spend with them.
My oldest, who is 16, is driving now and has a summer job so I no longer get to spend as much time with her.
I'll need to make the time I’m with her really “count.”
I’ll hopefully be able to spend more time with my youngest who is 13 (when she’s not locked in her bedroom on her phone chatting with friends:)
how am I going to accomplish my goals and not just be on autopilot this summer as I'm also trying to manage all the things – my work, the house, the dogs etc…
By having the intention to be PRESENT when I’m with them.
“One hour spent with another person while you are present has a more positive impact on the relationship than an entire weekend of being with them while you are afflicted by mind chatter.”
Shirzad Chamine author of “Positive Intelligence.”
Ok so how to do this?
Shirzad recommends practicing being present with your loved ones for just 5 minutes and see the great impact it has on your relationship.
He suggests that “when you hug them feel their breathing and heartbeat as you hold them.”
“When you are looking at them, really look at them. Look at their eyes. How does the color of their eyes shift? Is there a twinkle in their eyes?”
“If you say I love you, do you really feel the warmth of the love in your heart as you say the words?”
Another way to develop the habit of being present with a loved one is practicing Thich Nhat Hanh’s “Hugging Meditation.”
"According to the practice, you have to really hug the person you are holding.
You have to make him or her very real in your arms, not just for the sake of appearance, patting him on the back to pretend you are there, but breathing consciously and hugging with all your body, spirit, and heart.
‘Breathing in, I know my dear one is in my arms, alive. Breathing out, she is so precious to me.’
If you breathe deeply like that, holding the person you love, the energy of your care and appreciation will penetrate into that person and she will be nourished and bloom like a flower.”
Try this with a child, a parent, a partner or a friend… I dare you!
You’re worth it❤